Unemployment is a bad state of affairs.

Well I must be approaching the end (if not at least a turn off) of the unemployment tunnel. I can see a light at the end of the tunnel as new shows have hit the IATSE list. No phone numbers to any offices yet - so I'm still praying that something good will come from these potential new shows. I feel like i've been unemployed forever - because I didn't make any money on "The Storm". You reach a point where deferring your money is really not a good thing. I've realized that loss of motivation can come from being overworked and completely unpaid. :p That's not entirely true - I have loved volunteering my time for other projects in the past - I think something greater escaped me while I was on this project. My eyes were opened. All the drama that will never find it's way onto this blog (as that drama is for private journals). Life lessons that will never again be repeated. Your health and life are not deferable. Nor is your happiness. Ugh. Sadly, none the less, I have to be honest and say that this project has left me with a bad taste in my mouth and I spend a great deal of my time trying to overcome any darkness that clouds my heart and judgement.

So why is being unemployed so bad for me? Well, it started off on a good note. Watching movies - which is on the one hand productive (i am in the industry - and it's good to see what's out there) and on the other hand - i feel lazy. Sadly I have free cable. It's a nice little perk that i discovered after plugging in my television into this apartment two years ago. I had been 6 years without, and quite frankly didn't really miss it. Now that I sit here and channel surf, I have decided that telivision is like crack. It's terribly addictive. You can spend so much time flicking through complete garbage and still find a reason to stay on the couch. What is up with that?

Favorite channels: TBS - for the movies; Food Network - inspires me to cook/bake; OLN - because it's educational and motivational; Discovery - fun shows like mind busters and daily planet; and then there is Star TV.


In the midst of all this channel surfing that I have subjected myself to (mind you I don't ONLY watch tv, so please don't think that's how I spend my days) ... I have become a slave to a new television show. I love reality tv - yes, i'm a reality tv whore. You either love it or hate it - but i have found myself to be very fond of it. I absolutely love the Amazing Race, and sometimes watch Survivor. Anyway - along came one of the lamest reality tv shows that I know - Laguna Beach. I watched one episode and thought it was terrible. It follows a group of tenagers through their high school experience - mind you they are all beyond the richest people I've ever seen experiencing high school (it feels highly surreal - ex: their parents buy them bmws, they all live on oceanfront properties...). Yet, somehow I got suckered into this show after two episodes and am now slightly 'addicted'. Yuck.

I've never watched soap operas, and barely watch fictional television programs. I never understood the addiction to "Lost" because after one episode I thought it was really cheezy. But here I am - anxiously awaiting to see what happens next. I've never seen the first season - they are currently airing their second. On top of that - there is a spin off that starts on Wednesday called "The Hills" - and I know that I will want to watch that too. I think I officially need help.

This my friends, is what unemployment does to me. Oh my goodness.

On a side note I bought a mechanical pencil crayon. Have you ever seen these things? I was so happy when i discovered these clicky coloured pencil crayons. I'm a geek when it comes to supplies of that sort. I've started my collection with the colour pink.

I'm going to go pack - heading up to a friend's cottage tomorrow afternoon for one night (sad that it's so short - but what a happy blessing to bring encouragement to the week ahead. I have a good feeling about next week. Here's to prayers being answered and to an amazing Creator who makes things possible!

Hugs.