a little hello from above

After my day on the road, I take back what I said about the drivers in Toronto. I think I was driving along side all of those who have flunked out of the multitude of car driving schools in this city. I think driving in a big city will forever test your patience - which in the end can be a very good thing. But there are just some days where you do NOT want to be around all these people. Ugh ugh ugh.

I had a great drive home. Took the long way around to spend some time pondering in the car and blasting some ever so addicted music (I must admit that Tool's Aenima is still in my car's CD player). It was nice with the city standing as a backdrop as the sky was shifting to a pinkish hue. Coming up the Bayview extension I had a beautiful view of the clouds over the sun, with mounds of God rays spewing into the sky. It was a much needed moment.

I love looking at the sky...as you will notice the more I comment on the clouds and views I hold dear. Clouds are so fascinating.

VENT SESSION - Frustrating moment. The ongoing sagas with TS. I feel like I've written the same email 5 times, and nobody is actually listening to what I'm saying. UGH - for real. I am frustrated to no end with what seems to be happening. Sometimes I feel completely overlooked and underappreciated. Then when it's convenient for others - there is a tone that appears out of nowhere that is trying to get something out of you. This is NOT what I experience on every project - at the moment, I'm only speaking of TS. The positive - it's almost over. A very sad way of looking at things...


Naturally, Sadie is a blessing right now. I am so fortunate to be working with this office staff. Thank you God for this time!!! It was much needed and GREATLY appreciated!!!



Happy times:

1) Luz & Anna from accounting ROCK. They hit up 7-11 and bought some frozen goodies. Scored me a super fudgesicle.
2) Stopping off on set twice today - and being welcomed by smiling faces. I love this crew - even though I don't know them all yet.
3) Being on the late shift - it's never boring let me tell you. The last minute script changes are hiccups that I just smile about. That's life - right?
4) All the puppies I ran into today in the offices where I had drop offs, as well as meeting up with Hudson on set. I was so happy just petting them all today.
5) Spending time just chillin' with my living room mates yesterday and catching up :)


...

tear

Today, I felt down. I miss coming home to Aucky scurrying around in his cage, and just taking him out and petting him to sleep. I miss his constant running on the wheel.

I can't believe he's actually gone

The apartment is really quiet now.

I guess this is all part of the 'coming to terms' process.

...


ToMoRrOw I have softball. Saturday morning I think i'm going to go rollerblading along the waterfront at like 6.30am. To wake up and have a people freeish trip. Then it's an errands day. I might head out of town Saturday night and just go on a random adventure. I'm going to grab random people and just go. It will be fun.

What a blessing it is to have a vehicle. Aside from inevitable downfalls that you hit in life, I feel so unbelievably blessed lately. Amazing people and so many moments to smile about.

I sometimes wish I could lend my eyes to people so that they could see what makes my heart skip. Living is such an amazing thing.


two last comments.

1) When driving down queen street east - over the DVP you come to a sign on the bridge that says "The river I step in, is not the river I stand in." I really like this quote. I think it's a good thing to reflect on.

2) Yesterday someone at work made a comment and the other person hit them hard with a comeback. The initial person said "you just wounded my pride". I was thinking about it - and I think that is a GOOD thing. Pride is a very ugly thing at times...too much is a dangerous thing. I was just thinking about how having your pride 'wounded' is a good way to stay grounded. Delirious has a great song called Take Off My Shoes - some lyrics:

"Hold me, blow all the pride from my bones,
With your fire.
Hold me, breathe on this heart made of stone,
Keep it pure."

I'm not saying Pride is all bad. But in today's society I feel that we all have too much pride - that we're all just a little too stubborn. We took something that is good and thwarted it. Anyway - just a random bit of my two sense. I have no idea if anyone is actually going to read it or even think about it.

wurd. i'm going to clean up my apartment (the ongoing saga)...